#10 Life is sexually transmitted.
#9 Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die
#8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him
without an erection, make him a sandwich.
#7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a
person to use the internet and they won't bother you for
#6 Some people are like a slinky.. not really good for
anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove
them down the stairs.
#5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the
hospital dying of nothing
#4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no
attention to criticism.
#3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred
dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents???
#2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now
the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Home Security